Yo wassup Clawe Gang! This is going to be a special Slog, it’s gonna be written like Mad Libs! If you want to play along grab a piece of paper and write a word as requested below. Then when you read the story enter your words when prompted. The result should be a hilarious story!

  1. Adjective
  2. Verb (past tense)
  3. Adjective
  4. Profession plural
  5. Adverb
  6. Noun
  7. Body Part
  8. Adjective
  9. Plural Noun
  10. Verb (ending in ing)
  11. Verb (past tense)
  12. Adjective
  13. Body Part
  14. Verb (past tense)
  15. Exclamation
  16. Amount of time
  17. Adjective
  18. Verb (ing)
  19. Body part
  20. Adverb
  21. Adjective
  22. Emotion
  23. Plural noun
  24. Plural noun
  25. Profession

We started off in a Adjective 1 tavern where we Verb 2 Chu’d Upe a friendly farmer. Chu’d was sent as a messenger to seek our help! Adjective 3 little green men had been stealing sheep and the local Profession 4 needed us to find out who the robbers were.

A party Adverb 5 assembled. There was me, a total killer, Dr’zt the Noun 6 destroyer, Kad the Body Part 7 ripper, Alessio the Adjective 8 human, Desdemona the curious warlock who loves Noun 9 and Nehlossa the Verb 10 master.

We left for the local farmstead at night for our friend Dr’zt the gloomstalker. We got there quickly and were amazed at the insane amount of sheep! While Des got Verb 11 by sheep, Chu’d’s neighbours showed us the tracks. Eventually she joined us and we began our journey to find the perpetrators and stop them with whatever means necessary!

Walking at night was surprisingly fun, the moonlight illuminating the snow around us, the quiet sound of the wind blowing in the trees. It was very peaceful. Until it wasn’t. Suddenly, we were attacked by a bunch of Adjective 12 birds! I killed two of them but got bit on the Body part 13 during the fight! We dealt with them rather quickly but a few seconds later we were Verb 14 by a pack of wolves. We managed to defuse the situation by feeding them the bird corpses. It was quite the tense situation!

We continued our trek until the road was blocked by an upturned cart. Goblins quickly jumped out yelling Exclamation 15 ! Combat was swift, I ended 2 of their lives but the real MVP was Nehlossa! She put a ton of them to sleep! I tied up the sleepers but they somehow got away.. Probably with magic cause my knot was amazing. We followed their tracks for Amount of time 16 and decided to rest for the day. We would be able to follow the tracks in the moring.

During my watch, me and Des encountered a Adjective 17 man named Ozymandias. He was really nice. He’s travelling on some sort of religious quest. A few watches later we were woken up by screams. Gnolls were Verb 18 the party! I got hurt real bad and even got knocked out.. Luckily Alessio healed me closing up my Body Part 19 wounds. Turns out Ozy was a couatl all along! He fought by our side. I wasn’t super useful but still got 2 more kills!

At dusk we continued along the tracks Adverb 20 encountering a beatup farmstead. The tracks ended so we knew this was the spot. There was plenty of light indoors so Kad and I crept to the door. When I tried the handle someone came walking to check the noise! Luckily me and Kad jumped around the bend laying prone. Alessio lead the chitchat team inside as a nice old goblin opened the door.

I tried a side entrance and got spotted again. Luckily I played it off as being confused and having lost my friends so all was good! I joined the party inside with Kad. Only Dr’zt stayed out. The room was big and Adjective 21. There were quite a few gobbos indoors! They were quite chill while we asked them about the sheep but when we asked to leave.. They were quite Emotion 22. A few of them turned into wolf like creatures! Goblins came streaming into the room.. I flipped over a table and we quickly dealt with the gobbos and wolves but when all settled down we spotted a crying child!

The child was angry that we killed all its minions.. It turned into a giant Berghest! Killer of Plural Noun 23, creature of Gehenna! We fought for a long while until it started to runaway. I chased it outside and landed one super lucky shot with my bow, killing it! As it died it said “I’LL BE BACK TO EAT YOU CAT” I’m terrified.. I got 3 kills during that mega fight!

We looted the house afterwards but I opened a chest without checking for traps and got poisoned.. I felt like trash for a whole hour! Which was bad cause we got ambushed by gnolls during our rest.. They were total Plural noun 24! I was horrible because of the negative influence of the poison.. I got 0 kills…

After a quick rest we began walking back home camping halfway there. We met a banshee along the way! Her ghostly wails knocked me out.. but luckily Kad fed me a berry. The fight was tense but we got her. We met a kid along the road and reunited him with a man at the farm.. It was odd but we didn’t look into it, the kid seemed happy.

All in all this outing was filled with combat! Luckily we managed to “deal” with the sheep robbers without too much suffering. Oh and bonus, no one died so that’s pretty great!

Clawe the profession 25 Tabaxi